


The strilonde reunion

by striderinnit



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Multi, Tw pre-transition june
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-05
Updated: 2021-01-05
Packaged: 2021-03-15 22:42:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,938
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28571706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/striderinnit/pseuds/striderinnit
Summary: Karkat tags along to the strilonde family reunion because all his homies are going and he doesn't have anything else to do. His homies include the couples dirk and john, and rose and kanaya. So by association he finds himself at the shindig. Which is where he meets the one and only dave strider for the first time
Relationships: Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas, John Egbert/Dirk Strider, Rose Lalonde/Kanaya Maryam
Kudos: 8





	1. Chapter 1

Karkat hated texas, he hated it with a passion burning almost as bright as their shitty texan sun. He hated it for a multitude of reasons, for the old white humans who gave him strange looks, For the infernal “tex-mex”,for all those cacti, whats up with that. but today he hated it for being the center of the strilonde reunion. It all started because his cousin Kanaya mentioned how she would be going with Rose. Then his “buddy” John would be going with dirk. He liked Rose and Dirk, don't get it twisted. However, he did not like texas. It was the worst fucking state. But it was summer vacation and as the 5 shared a house together (alongside roxy) karkat was not about to be in that big ass house alone for 2 weeks while they were gone. So he came with. He’d known all the 3 family members that came to be his roommates for a while. He met Rose when she and Kanaya began dating, and he met Dirk and Roxy in college. The one he’d never met, but only heard faint mentions of: was dave. Dave Strider was a mystery to him, the young strider set off from his family and went to a different college. Somewhere in New York, if he remembered correctly. He never came to visit, so Karkat had simply never seen him. I guess that would end today. 

Kanaya drove the car as Rose sat in the front next to her. Dirk and roxy sat in the next row of seats leaving Karkat and John in the back. John turned to karkat with a smile and began to ramble,”mee-maw strider makes the best pork balls, and Dave might bring the cold pressed apple juice again”, he trailed off in thought.  
“So is the mysterious strider a damn apple farmer?”, Karkat pondered with a raised brow. “Who,dave?”John laughed. “No he’s an art student or something, the dude makes the best fresh juice though”. Karkat nodded, wondering what this ‘dave’ looked like. Probably shared the same traits as the rest of his siblings. Blonde hair, freckled face, eyes a strange colour. They were all eccentric in a way. The car ride was long, filled with mixtapes and switching out drivers every couple of hours. In the last few minutes, Dirk pulled the car into an already crowded parking lot. It was mid-afternoon and the sun shone down in it's rays. Kanaya thought to bring a comically large hat but karkat had no such luck. Troll skin was very sensitive to bright exposure. Alternia isn't exactly sunshine city.  
They walked like ducks in a row to the front door and simply walked right in. it was a myriad of folks. Faces turned to the door and yelled out greetings to the group. The 3 exchanged hugs with family and friends while Kanaya and John said polite greetings to them. Karkat stood in the doorway, staring down at his shoes. He was introduced by someone, as kanaya's cousin and the 6th roommate of their house. He waved sheepishly and tried to put on what looked like a friendly smile. As his friends moved throughout the house, he found a nice seat by the snack table and grabbed a can of Tab. It seems like everyone going 3 generations down was there, he saw a couple of trolls which was good so Kanaya wouldn't feel left out. However, in a way, he felt left out. He took steady sips from the tab and glanced around,basic family party. Dancing,drinking, hogtieing. Whatever it is they do in texas. What the fuck was a ‘hogtie’ what are they doing to the pigs, gross fucks. at some point the door opened again. It was a tall guy,tan skin, freckled face, curly blonde hair, and eyes a deep red. He had sunglasses sat on his forehead and headphones around his neck.”yall really just started the wicked moves without me, i feel offended”,he smiled. There was no mistake about it, that was Dave strider.


	2. Chapter 2

The short haired strider found his siblings in the crowd immediately. You could tell they were related, not just by their facial features but how they interacted with each other. Karkat stayed in his corner, not wanting to intrude. That was when somebody called out,”hey karkat, come over here”. Roxy called for him with a smile on her face. He gripped his can a little bit tighter and walked over there. These were his friends, he’d seen 3 out of the 5 naked, nothing to worry about. He found a spot between kanaya and dirk and joined the circle. “This is the prick we sadly have to call a brother”, Rose laughed, motioning to Dave. He looked karkat in the eyes, and quite frankly it made him feel some type of way. Bright red. That colour could describe multiple things right now. If i, the narrator, didnt know any better id say karkat had a flush crush on this stranger. But anyway, the two shook hands. “Nice to finally meet you”,dave smiled. “You too”,karkat replied. Well that was most definitely the most awkward experience he’d had in his life. Jegus fuck he felt like he was six sweeps old again, all giddy inside and shit. Disgusting. He joined in the conversation and eventually settled in, the siblings told embarrassing childhood stories about each other and the conversation went on. About an hour later they were sitting in a circle discussing something about a...christmas pickle. “What the fuck is a christmas pickle”,karkat questioned with a laugh. He knew that humans called 12th perigee christmas but why was there a pickle involved. Dave gasped as if he’d been stabbed,”d u d e”, he said seriously. “You don't know about the christmas pickle?”, he asked if it was obviously information. Karkat raised an eyebrow and shook his head. “Alright listen up, mothers and fuckers of the jury”, Dave cleared his throat and sat up a little bit straighter. “The Christmas pickle is a glorious tradition involving that sweet sweet bumpy green phallus”,this was given with the same energy as a political speech. “Mee-maw and pappap hide it in the tree every year, and the winner....”, he paused for theatrics.. “Gets a gift card”, he whispered. Roxy added an ‘oh shit’ for effect. “You hide..a porcelain vegetable in the tree, to win money”,karkat repeated to make sure he heard it correctly. “You bet your bottom bitch we do”,Dave smiled. Kanaya interjected,” it's like the 12th perigee's barn beast”. “At least for that you get a shiny 15 boondollars”, karkat complained as if it was a grave difference. “How many dollars is a boonbuck worth”,roxy wondered aloud. “If a boonbuck is a million boondollars”,kanaya mumbled. “Converting boon to usd takes too long”,karkat concluded, grabbing another drink from the cooler. “Isn't that what troll and human kids are learning these days”,Rose pointed out. “Sucks to be them”. 

At some point later in the night, everyone was gathered into the main area. Grandpoppa and Mumsie Lalonde, and Mee-Maw and Pappap Strider, stood on the mantle. “Welcome all, to our annual Strilonde reunion”, mumsie smiled. A chorus of cheers and hoots erupted from the room. “We’ve had a great time so far”, she paused, and let a devious smile crawl onto her face. “But now, it's time for the games. Hushed whispers enveloped the crowd. Awwh shit what was happening now. The 4 strilondes closest to him were looking at each other with that same damned smirk. Dave whispered to his siblings,”your asses are gonna get handed to you. Like you've suffered years of ass famine” “what the fuck is happening”, karkat whispered to kanaya. “It's like the olympics, insofar as, if the olympics were a group of untrained humans participating in games i can only describe as, country”, she explained. Karkat was a damn cItY bOy and he was not about to milk a cow while doing an acrobatic fucking pirouette or some shit. “Now for all our new-comers or folks whose memory is down the shitter, the games go like this”,mee-maw began. “You split off into teams of 2 and compete against everyone else to complete the given tasks. Whoever wins, them and their partner get the good bedroom for the whole time”. Gasps and whispers were spread at mention of the ‘good bedroom’ fucking christ. His friends split off into groups like clockwork, rose and john, kanaya and roxy, dirk chose lil cal as his partner and no one wanted to disagree on that point so that's really all there is to say on the matter. Leaving dave and karkat. “Looks like it's you and me, karkles”, Dave said, flipping his shades down over his eyes like a shitty action movie. “Don't call me that, dill weed”. Dave only smiled and shook his head, going to get the task list. “Alright,alright, this shit is o n and fucking boiling”,he put an arm on the shorter boys shorter and held the paper between the two. Karkat shrugged away from his elbow but read the neatly typed list.

-

The first assignment was to: Find a movie with ben stiller on the dvd shelf

“Who the hell is ben stiller?”, Karkat scoffed with a raised brow, “dude, seriously”, Dave laughed, “the guy from zoolander”. “Oooh, you mean troll ben stiller”,karkat sighed in realization. “It's the same name you just made troll a prefix”, Dave exclaimed. “Look man, I don't know who this ben stiller is but troll ben stiller is shit”, the troll made this bold statement as if there was a huge difference. “Yall are like smurfs, adding your species in front of words to make it different”, Dave shook his hands to emphasize the point. With a shrug, karkat raced off to what he presumed was the dvd shelf based on the people quickly gathering around it. With his 5’4 height and body mass of a 5 sweep old he went with the idea. He crawled through in between and around peoples legs until he got within arms length of the shelf. Surrounded by shouting and rapidly moving movie cases, he stormed his eyes through the list in front of him. He could hear dave somewhere in the above ground trying to search the higher shelves. Karkat reached around, maybe there was a secret hidey hole he had to pull a certain dvd for. The whole shelf will rotate like some nickelodeon tv spy movie and they go into a wacky adventure with a kooky cast of characters. This is stupid. Shaking the thought from his head, he shifted his position on the ground. The people higher up probably had more advantages, as he craned his head to look at the titles, a glint from under the shelf caught his eye. First casting a careful glance to make sure nobody was looking, he reached for it. It was a dvd of ben stiller movie number 5 with a note attached, “move on to the next task”, he slid out with caution to make it seem like he still hadnt found it. Moving with stealth, he grabbed dave by the arm and pulled him off to the side. “Dude did you find-”, he started off much too loud before karkat shushed him. “Shut up strider”,he whispered violently, pulling the disc from his pocket. “Next task”,he smiled. They turned their attention to the piece of paper for their next assignment. 

Task 2: find pappaps dentures


End file.
